Friends

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Friends

Postby James Brimer » Thu Jul 08, 2010 3:25 pm

Is it normal for Dyspraxic's to feel social interaction is not really nececery?, I was talking to a fellow explorer scout a few days ago and he said he felt the urge to make friends, I have no such feeling. Even if it is with a new group I am qiute happy to sit in the corner and do my own thing..

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Re: Friends

Postby Steph » Thu Jul 08, 2010 9:33 pm

I have the urge to make friends-I just can't do it on first impressions-it takes me a long while before I can make true friends.
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Re: Friends

Postby MontyDyspraxia » Thu Jul 08, 2010 10:35 pm

Friends? I...DESPISE...friends. I'm better on my own.
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Re: Friends

Postby Remus » Fri Jul 09, 2010 12:11 am

I'm quite solitary by nature but I do feel lonely at times. I don't have a lot of friends, only a few close ones who I cherish and mean the world to me. I think it's important to have friends as they can pick you up from the floor and cheer you up quite quickly. I would like more friends but I do struggle to make true friends as I struggle to see through people and see their geninue selves.
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Re: Friends

Postby James Brimer » Fri Jul 09, 2010 6:49 am

What I meant was, Is it normal for a Dyspraixic to feel no desire to make friends, see anyone after a few days etc, no desire to even make friends but happy to do my own thing i..e human biology???? :?, I will aproach some people i just get really nervous and mumble a lot :?
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Re: Friends

Postby Remus » Tue Jul 13, 2010 7:26 pm

I would say that is more of a social thing than a dyspraxic thing but that's just me.
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Re: Friends

Postby evilmuffet » Wed Jul 14, 2010 5:02 pm

I prefer being on my lonesome since It's hard making friends and I enjoy my own company. Think not being interested in making friends is more of a autistic thing though.
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Re: Friends

Postby LadyAnna » Tue Aug 24, 2010 9:39 pm

I have always struggled to find friends with the same interests as me.School trips like Flamingo land (rollercoasters) send chills down my spine.The very thought of socialising and hearing people talk about thier hectic social lives, on street corners gettin dunk.And then havin pressure to go on a rollercoaster afterwards is pure hell! I have never went shoppin with friends or have socialised with people outside of school. I think people think that i am stuck up or something but in reality i just don't know what to say !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! even my parents quiz me about my quitness and i frequently get wrong for going into myself and not talking just listening !!!!!!!!! Am i the only insecure 15 year old who feels this way ???????????????
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Re: Friends

Postby monkey » Wed Aug 25, 2010 5:41 am

I somtiems find it difiuclt to make friends. but I have a lot of freinds. It did not just hapen. a lot of my closest friensd are from this forum. I have a desire for friends.
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Re: Friends

Postby JamesStanley » Wed Aug 25, 2010 9:43 am

I mainly like to be alone im not good at socalizing with others so thats why i dont have many friends however i do have a few friends who i sometimes go out with.
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Re: Friends

Postby Rosie-posie » Wed Aug 25, 2010 10:36 am

I think a lot of dyspraxia have shyness as well. I find I'm fine after people get to know me and feel comfortable with them but at the beginning i can be really shy and quiet people just have to be prepared to get to know me. I used to have trouble making friends when I was at secondary school but find it a bit easier these days as I've had a core group of friends ive had for quite a few years and I find it easier with people older/younger than me. Sometimes I like to be on my own but not all the time.
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Re: Friends

Postby parnassus » Wed Aug 25, 2010 2:03 pm

I think it varies from person to person. I'm somewhere in the middle. There are occasional times when I do get lonely, and I do wish I saw my friends more often, but most of the time I'm quite happy on my own. This doesn't mean that most of the time I don't want any friends - I'm very happy to know that my friends are in the world, somewhere, going about their business. It just isn't necessary for me to have them with me in order for me to feel happy.

During my transition to secondary school I was painfully lonely and I missed my friends so much that I had physical pains in my stomach and head. My family had moved city, and I was nine hundred miles away from everyone I knew. It takes me a long time to make friends, and in this situation I struggled - in all the time we lived in Jeddah, I only ever made one friend. That didn't bother me too much; what I wanted was my old friends, not new ones.

There is a stereotype that people with autism do not feel the need for friendship. At first I believed it. Then, when I was told that I was autistic, I thought, "Oh, maybe it just applies to severely autistic people." And then I met some severely autistic people, including Candy (monkey), and I thought, "Maybe it just applies to autistic people who have learning disabilities as well!" Then I started work in a special needs college for people with LDs, where many of the students have autism, and I finally knew it was rubbish. :P

These things are highly individual - some dyspraxic people will want friends, and others won't. There is no fixed pattern. We're all different.
"This above all, to thine own self be true." - Polonius, Hamlet.
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Re: Friends

Postby Creative » Wed Aug 25, 2010 5:09 pm

I can make friends, it just takes me a lot of time and effort.
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Re: Friends

Postby Super Nekou » Thu Aug 26, 2010 1:35 pm

I had loads of friends and enjoyed their company at school..yet when I left and they wanted me to spend time with them I didnt like it. Needless to say, I've lost them all now. Didnt bother me, I was just happy talking to them on MSN from time to time, but it seems you need to see people to keep friendly with them.
Oh well.
I have my boyfriend now and he's my best friend as well as my boyfriend, and I do everything with him, so I'm happy on the social front. I have no real desire to socialise other than him.
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Re: Friends

Postby Fenrir » Thu Aug 26, 2010 10:38 pm

I like to have a few friends, but i can live by myself quite easily. Sometimes, i find the less the better, as theres less chance of you feeling that your losing contat etc. At the moment, i have about 5 friends who i can say that i 'feel' liek im their friend and that i'd be upset if they went away.

The rest of the "friends" i have though, i couldnt care less for, and it gets more like that each day. A lot of the time, i'd be glad to get to know them and be friends with them, but it normally seems like they dont feel the same way. (one of the friends who i hung round with at school is his birthday tommorow, and he's having a get together tommorow. He's asked the group of guys who we hung round with to go, plus 2 of my friends out of the 5. Not me though, and it's things like that, that make me feel further away each time).

So yeah, i like friends, but i find it much easier to have a small amount who i can actually say are my friends, rather than being part of a 'group' (like those people on facebook with 400+ friends they've never talked to :P )
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