Could you forgive...?

[Katielauren2001]

I was watching this video in R.E about could you forgive if someone killed someone in your family,or tortured them.I would never forgive such vile people such as Myra Hindley and Ian Bradey.They tortured and killed children in such a horrific way then buried them in the moors.

Drink driving could ruin lives as well,but would you forgive your child's killer so much that you got up and hugged him in court.I said no,this is horrible to the boy.They forgave the man,to such an extent they actually even considered him as a friend in my mind.

Would you do the same? Would you forgive the killer if one of your family members was killed?

[intowiz]

id go crow on them and hunt the person who murdere and/or tortured that person close to me. if it was someone who had been drink driving id be pissed but wouldnt be so harsh as my punishment for the first one. and if it was a driver who just plain did it accidentily without drink i would be pissed but would go no further than that.

[cookie-monster]

i think it depends on the circumstances really

[parnassus]

I chose the last option. I have no way of knowing of how I would behave in such a painful situation.

As a Christian, I would pray for the gift of forgiveness. Even if somebody murdered my own family, I wouldn't want them to murder my soul as well, and I know that anger and hatred can inflict terrible damage on a person. Anger is a natural response in a situation like that, but it is not a response to cultivate. I would try to tear it out of myself through my prayer, as however hard it might be I genuinely do believe that forgiveness is a gift to be offered to everybody.

It isn't easy for me to say that. I have a very close friend who suffered from horrible sexual abuse for years. It's left her in a lot of pain. Sometimes I have wished her rapist dead. Sometimes I've dreamed of torturing him myself - never quite killing him, but torturing him until he has tears and snot running down his face. These dreams have always left me feeling horrified at myself as well as horrified at him.

How could he do that? To a child? To a young, growing girl? To anyone? The questions baffle me. I'm angry because I love her. And because I love her, I want to forgive.

[parnassus]

My views on this have been refined over the weekend. While I was at the Carmelite retreat house in Oxford I discovered an extraordinary man named Titus Brandsma. He inspired me so much that I wrote my weekly reJesus blog entry about him. You can read it here: http://www.rejesus.co.uk/blog/?p=76

He was able to forgive the tormentors who held him in the concentration - even the woman who was about to kill him by lethal injection. I pray that I will have courage and love like that one day.

[intowiz]

your horrified at thinking that but thats only natural it can even help relieve stress. everyday brings aggrevation aholes who push and are rude on the highstreet, the bus driver that drives past you, the racist you hear in your ear when waiting in an extremely long line where the girl at the checkout is normally very rude, the newspaper with the rapist who murdered peaple. replay this day only this time you have a knife maybe these need to be more extreme offences first but you ge where im going. finish this give thje monster inside a pat on the back and a high five then put him away till next week. though you have found an alternative method a christian view and prayer which i find is excellent if that helps, i choose meditation myself but sometimes the monster is neded to remane sane. im rambling now ithink.

[parnassus]

im rambling now ithink.

Yes, you are. I think I understand what you mean, though.

finish this give thje monster inside a pat on the back and a high five then put him away till next week. though you have found an alternative method a christian view and prayer which i find is excellent if that helps, i choose meditation myself but sometimes the monster is neded to remane sane.

I know that anger can be natural and I try not to beat myself up over it. It is the sheer pleasure I take from being violently angry that worries me, as it is so far removed from the mercy and forgiveness that I believe in.

[Katielauren2001]

I suppose maybe I could forgive if it would stop me beating myself up about it. A family member didn't get murdered,but something very bad happened to them.I still can't forgive,I don't know why,it's maybe because I was also hurt by this person too.

[Miranda]

I can't forgive my it.
He is too evil
I want to
But it isn't possible
But I don't blame him
Just me

[tears_on_a_pillow]

Miranda you can not blame yourself for the actions of others, when others have done wrong things to you

(you know what I am refering to, and I know it is easy for me to say, and hard to read, for such a long time I blamed myself for so so much that happened to me, but then in time I started to accept that they are wrong and I did nothing wrong, yes some days I hate myself and blame myself but they are wrong and did wrong)

[Page]

I know that anger can be natural and I try not to beat myself up over it. It is the sheer pleasure I take from being violently angry that worries me, as it is so far removed from the mercy and forgiveness that I believe in.

You need not be worried about that. The flesh wages war against the soul constantly, as is stated in I Peter 2:11. It's something that every Christian has to deal with on a personal level.

In fact, I would be more concerned if you experienced this and did NOT feel troubled by it after the fact.

[rachel]

well yes I would

[C]

I think the wuestion 'Would you forgive the killer if one of your family members was killed?' could be interpreted in many different ways. The killing could have been accidental, for example, or the killer may be acting in self defence.

However, from reading the rest of the first post, I take that question to mean intentionally killed/murdered. If someone murdered a family member of mine I don't think I have it in me to forgive them. Just thinking about it now fills me with anger. So no, I wouldn't forgive. Not ever.

[Katielauren2001]

I blame myself for what happened to her
And I feel hatred towards him.

This is how I feel that I could have prevented this happening to my sister.

[eastlondonluke]

I couldent forgive someone for somethin like a killing i wish people dat have had family mebers taken from them like dat could get justic but sadley it dosent allways come your way.