Positive Tips

Share any tips or ideas that you have which make living with dyspraxia easier.(Please start a new thread for each tip)

Positive Tips

Postby Remus » Sun Aug 24, 2008 8:11 pm

Okay, here the deal. I've been feeling a bit down later but I'm sure all of you have been through times like that.

I myself suffer badly staying positive, a few people have said to me that I am the most negative ever met which is just well... charming. :evil:

So anyway, I'm just creating this board for all of you to share any positive tips although a board like this has probably been done before, excuse me if it has. So how about we all take turns and each come up with a way to keep positive. I'll go first.

Music - I find that just listening to a good song you absoluetly love can turn you day around. When I listen to songs I love, I just feel a lot more positive about things.
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Postby Steph » Mon Aug 25, 2008 12:50 am

I find talking to people who will, if not understand, at least listen to you nd not judge you for how you are feeling or want you to change (I only have a handful of close friends tha would not want me to change anything in my personality and I truly appreciate them for that) cheers me up somewhat. Coming on DT helps immensely too.
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Postby Fortnox » Wed Aug 27, 2008 11:04 am

How old are you? If you're going through that period of time everyone has to do, where you realise the world is not the wonderful place sunday cartoons told you it was, you'll get over it. Just about everyone has a depressing change in their life as a teenager, a time when you start to realise there IS war, death and destruction in the world today. But, that's just the process of maturing, of becoming and adult. One day you'll wake up and it'll be gone, but you'll be better for having experienced that.

However, when it comes to tips, music is a great one. Listen to a really cheery song like "Its The Best Day Ever"
or "I'd Like To Teach The World To Sing"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xnms04P7 ... re=related

Also, get out. Go to the cinema with friends or have a sleep over, do things. Staying inside all day reading stupid things on the internet is a great way to stay depressed.
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Postby Creative » Wed Aug 27, 2008 1:38 pm

It's difficult to get out much socially if you don't drive and have only a few friends. It is very easy to spend too much time on the internet.
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Postby Creative » Wed Aug 27, 2008 1:42 pm

Sorry that post was not very positive!

Hobbies to do indoors apart from the internt are:

1 Reading
2 Watching TV
3 Doing Crossword Puzzles
4 Listen to music

Please think of more!
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Postby Joss1991 » Wed Aug 27, 2008 4:04 pm

talking really helps me , but so can locking myself away from the world for a while , reading is good in that case cause you can escape into another world, so is cooking or arts and crafrs as you have to concentrate on something else
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Postby Creative » Wed Aug 27, 2008 4:51 pm

Talkng helps me too as does writing. Maybe I will keeep a diary in the new year. It seems silly to start one now!

Also I may try writing stories and poems again. That is another thing to do rather than coming on the internet!
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Postby Joss1991 » Thu Aug 28, 2008 9:08 pm

what i have posted hear is a list of alternatives to selfharm list but thecould be useful for general feeling happy and getting rid of anger technique, the reason some numbers are missed out is because i have deleted the ones that have directly to do with selfharm.

3. Punch a pillow or something else soft.
4. Scream (not at someone, just sort of a Tarzan yell.) Or, i f no one's around, I've found that screaming
obscenities (!) also seems to work.
6. Cry. Crying can release the pent up emotions
7. Exercise; go to the gym, walk your dog, or play a sport that requires a lot of energy. Exercise endorphins, the body's natural "feel-good" chemicals.
8. Try not to be alone. Call a friend, talk to them (not even necessarily about what's bothering you), be with people, or call your therapist (if you have one)
9. Do something that you enjoy and that requires focus (to take your mind OFF whatevers bothering you.
10. Be nice to yourself. Take a hot bath, read a favorite book, watch a movie you enjoy.
11. Remind yourself that you are loved
12. Pray, if you're religious. Faith, no matter what faith it is, can help through life's darkest times.
13. Listen to music (something relaxing)
14. Reach out to people ( online, volunteer work, etc.)
15. If a certain person or situation is upsetting you, leave the room, leave the premises, get away from whoever or whatever is bothering you.
16. Tear up paper
17. Throw ice cubes against a wall.
18. Write in a journal.
19. Meditate.
20. Give yourself a mental "break."
22. Scribbling on sheets and sheets of paper
23. Writing (poetry, stories, journal, etc.)
24. Cuddling with a stuffed animal
25. Watching a favorite TV show (preferable a comedy)
26. Posting on web boards, and answering others' posts
28. Painting your nails
29. Going to see a movie
30. Eating something ridiculously sweet (or any favorite food)
31. Doing school work
32. Surf the net
33. Go into chat rooms to talk
34. Play a musical instrument
35. Sing
36. Look up at the sky (especially if it's night-time)
37. Punch a punching bag
38. Shoot rubber-bands across the room
41. Sleep if you're tired
42. Play with a pet
43. Detangle yarn or necklaces
44. Reorganize your room
45. Clean
46. Have a pillow-fight with the wall
47. Knit or Sew
48. Dress up very glamorous
49. Color your hair
50. Watch a candle burn
52. Watch a scary movie
53. Have a vivid fantasy love affair with a celebrity
54. Work on a website
55. Go somewhere very public
56. Bake
57. Alphabetize your CDs
58. Chew leather
59. Hugs :]
60. Write a letter or e-mail
61. Talk to yourself
62. Stroke nice fabrics
63. Hug a Pillow
64. Hyper-focus on something like a rock, hand, etc.
65. Dance
66. Pop bubble-wrap
67. Make hot chocolate
68. Play with modelling clay or Play - Dough
69. Count to one hundred
70. Hug yourself
71. Pop balloons
72. Build a pillow fort
73. Complete something you've been putting off
74. Drink absurd amounts of tea
75. Break plastic plates
76. Tear up socks
77. Throw socks against the wall
78. Cook a meal
79. Go out for ice cream
80. Look at pretty things like flowers or artwork
81. Randomly wave at people
82. Make a list of blessings in your life
83. Watch an old, happy movie
84. Throw a temper tantrum
85. Hit things
86. Go for a bicycle ride
87. Draw on the walls
88. Play with face-paint.
89. Do very glamorous make-up
90. Color with crayons
91. Memorize a song
92. Put on boots and stamp
93. Stretch
94. Come up with baby names
95. Burn a CD of all your favorite songs
96. Name all of your stuffed animals
97. Get into your PJ's and just veg.
99. Plan your wedding
100. Hunt for stuff on Ebay
101. Alphabetize your books
102. Try to make as many words out of your full name as possible
103. Count ceiling tiles
104. Color co-ordinate your wardrobe
105. Scribble over the pretty woman in magazines
106. Play with a slinky
107. Play video/computer games
108. Write yourself an 'I love you because' letter
109. Put on fake nails
110. Go to a public place and people watch
111. Smile at at least five people
112. Go to the zoo and rename all the animals
113. Deep breathing.
114. Relaxation techniques
115. Take a hot bath
116. Go for a walk
119. Work with paint, clay, play-dough, etc. . You can also stab the play-dough, throw it at the walls, punch it, squeeze it hard etc.
120. Draw a picture of what or who is making you angry or sad
121. Write a letter to the person who's making you feel this way if there is one. You don't ever have to send it, but just writing it down helps work stuff out.
125. Try some sewing, crossstitch, etc.
126. Recite a poem, prayer, or anything else familiar that comforts you, multiple times.
127. Write down all of your positive points Keep it to refer to in the future.
128. Yoga
129. Take a shower
130. Write down a word best associated with what you are feeling (ie. horrible, sad, lonely, angry) and continue to write it down, over and over. Sometimes when you do that, the words look silly etc., and it puts humor or a smile in your life.
131. Sing a song on what you are feeling.
136. Make a list of friends you can call.
137. Focus on what is real and around you right then. There is no such thing as the past or the future - only the now!
138. Be aware of the world - say to yourself what you see (The couch is green. The light is on. I can feel my shoe pinching my foot.)
139. Make a contract with someone you care about and who cares about you. You don't have to 'know' them in the real world -Internet friends are fine. Make sure you try to get in touch with them when you feel upset.
140. Create an internal safe place where you can go. In a time when you feel safe and secure, create a room or a garden or any safe area inside yourself where you can retreat to and get away from external stresses. Add as many detials as you can to make it real for you.
141. Get a warm drink and curl up in a warm place with a stuffed animal. Buy yourself a special stuffed toy if you do not already have one. Make yourself some tea or hot chocolate and curl up under a nice warm comforter or blanket with lots of pillows.
142. Have a bath and finger paint with ketchup.
143. Try not to be hard on yourself for feeling this way. Try not to beat yourself up inside by calling yourself names or expecting yourself to just "not feel this way" or "snap out of it". This interanl namecalling and self-verbal abuse will only make you feel worse.
144. Tell yourself how you feel now will not last forever. It is hard to remember that while you are in the midst of these feelings, but EVERYTHING changes. Just focus on you and what you need to do to get through these feelings as safely as you can.
148. Flatten aluminum cans for recycling, seeing how fast you can go.
149. Use a pillow to hit a wall, pillow-fight style.
150. Rip up an old newspaper or phone book.
153. Break sticks.
154. Slap a tabletop hard with another object.
155. Clap hard. .
157. Play a difficult computer game.
158. Choose an object in the room. Examine it carefully and then write as detailed a description of it as you can. Include everything: size, weight, texture, shape, color, possible uses, feel, etc.
162. Go for a drive or ride your bike.
164. Create a Neopet.
165. Plan your next vacation as do as much of it as you can online. You don't have to book anything but plan as much as you can right down to the smallest detail.
165. Buy yourself a special plant and take extra-special care of it.
166. Go through magazines and catalogues and cut out all of the words that make you feel good.
167. Start at one page on the internet and follow all the links from that page and see how far away from the original subject you can get - try following links so that you go from depression sites to sites about positive things.
167. Go for a walk and smile at everyone you see. If you are feeling braver, say hello to everyone, too.
168. Do some finger painting with food - ice cream, chocolate pudding, jam, custard... try all sorts of different things.
169. Buy a coloring book and some colored pencils and color away!
170. Pump up the volume of your favorite music and doodle on a peice of paper in time to it.
171. Get together some bottles and go to the bottlebanks. You can throw them in really agressively but it's still safe.
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Postby Creative » Sun Oct 12, 2008 6:06 pm

It makes me feel good about myself when I read the report my mentor did on me and I realise how much progress I have made since leaving college.

If you feel down then try writing a list of things you have achieved recently in the achievements section even if they only seem small.

Also record good things that happen to you and positive comments people make about you.

Don't get cross with yourself for having negative thoughts as this wont help.
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Postby Hermionefan5 » Thu Feb 19, 2009 3:56 am

Wow, this is like the perfect day for me to find this topic as I had a crisis of confidence not two hours ago where I bawled my eyes out. :(

I think the best thing you can do, because I have gotten out of these things before, is acknowledge it and then try to get your mind on something else.

I have a box where I put all my little thoughts, positive or negative and I put them away so I won't dwell on them anymore througout the day (esp. the negative ones). It helps to write them down and put them away so I can't see them.

Crying is a good release too, but personally, I don't like to cry and so it is a last resort and often comes up really unexpectedly.

De-stressing your life. I've been thinking on this one. Maybe you can only finish a few things per day. Don't make your to-do list any harder than it has to be otherwise you end up failing anyway and feeling miserable. Make it manageable for you and understand when you don't meet your goals it is not all because you are a bad person. It is because you just didn't meet your goals and that is okay. I have trouble with this one so I say this for myself as well as others.

Carry a worry stone. Even if you don't worry a lot, carry a little stone or object in your pocket that you can rub on if you get sad or nervous or what have you. You can put your feelings onto it and then you don't have to feel as sad anymore. I carry one and it helps quite a bit.

Talk with a friend who will not judge. I know this has already been mentioned, but talking with friends really helps. My dad, for instance, is an excellent listener.

Music--yes already said before, but I can't stress enough how much music and movies and TV can help you with being more +, especially if that music/movie/TV is upbeat or comedic.

As they say in the great children's book, "Alexander and the No-Good Very Bad Day," "Some days are like that even in Australia." Sometimes we have terrible days and we have days when we really feel horrible about ourselves. It's a fact of life and it isn't fair, but when it happens, I think maybe it is just best to look forward to tomorrow. I dunno. As I said, I have some problems with this as well.
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Postby parnassus » Fri Feb 20, 2009 2:09 pm

Recently I was rereading The Voyages of Dr Dolittle, a battered old book that I've had since I was eight or nine. Polynesia the parrot says something that definitely belongs in this thread:

"Of course it is perfectly true the Doctor does do everything wrong. But with him it doesn't matter. Mark my words, if you travel with John Dolittle you always get there, as you heard him say. I've been with him lots of times and I know. Sometimes the ship is upside down when you get there, and sometimes it's right way up. But you get there just the same."
"This above all, to thine own self be true." - Polonius, Hamlet.
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Postby Hermionefan5 » Fri Feb 27, 2009 4:33 pm

I know this is easier said than done, but try not to dwell on the bad stuff that happens. I had a bad day yesterday and it was hard--still is, but I am just trying to watch funny movies like "Juno" and listen to music I love.

Other tips:

1. Keep busy
2. If you have a pet, confide in them about your problems. Trust me, it helps and they listen without judgement.
3. Make sure that if you are on meds you are taking them the right way and on time.
4. Go for a walk.
5. Read a book that will get you away from it all.
6. Watch a really great movie that you love--particularly a funny one.
7. Funny TV shows work good too.
8. Remember what Lance Armstrong said, "I only have good days and great days." If you look at the bright side of things, it's not so bad and you don't have to call your 'bad' days 'bad days.' They can be 'okay' days or something that makes it more positive.
9. Get good sleep. That helps a lot to calm nerves and such.
10. Cut down on caffeine if you can because it can make you more tired, nervous and on edge. It's okay to have some caffeine, but too much can be bad sometimes.
11. Make sure that any meds you take don't interact with others you might take for say other sicknesess like allergies or colds.
12. Do the water squeeze. This is a think my mom taught her school class to do. You put your arms completely in front of you, squeeze your fists and tighten your body as much as you can and then after a little while, breathe out and release. It releases some stress you've been holding in and really works! :)
13. Do something with your hands. THis really helps me. If my hands are busy, at least I"m concentrating on something else and I am not just sitting idly by. I'm getting some of the tension out of my body.
14. I don't remember if I mentioned this, but make a shoebox for all your bad troubles. Decorate it with stuff you like and quotes or things you enjoy. Put a slit in the top and then write down anything good or bad that happens to you whenever you need to. Forget about the bad stuff instantly after you put it in there. Out of sight, out of mind. Then, at the end of the month, throw away all your good and bad times into the recycling or wastebasket. They are now forgotten and you can start anew for the next month. I have found this to be quite therapeutic given my other disorder coupled with my NVLD.
15. Remember that sometimes it sucks to have a disorder or even two or three disorders, but that you wouldn't have it if you were not capable of fighting it. Sometimes we fall, but we can always make it back up if we try.
16. Nobody is "normal." Everyone has unique challenges that give them trouble some of the time so don't let those bullies who say they are "normal" to get you down. They have problems too.
17. Remember that somebody always loves you (even if it is just yourself) and that you can do anything you want if you put your mind to it.
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